Billy Testo

Testo Billy

Billy is a new man,
He does the best he can
To figure out what it's about
And what the hell he's meant to be.
He does the right thing when expected,
'Nuff respect,
Once in a while he likes a smoke and a joke,
Just as long as it's P.C.
And he thinks that he cries at the movies
'Cause he's in touch with his feminine side.
Sally wants a proud man
Sally wants a proud man
Sally wants a proud man
'Cause she's taken all his pride.

Billy is a new man, at least when she's around
A model father or if needed,
He'll be mother for the day,
He watches "Men Behaving Badly"
Though he'll gladly switch it off
If she's offended
He'll pretend it wasn't funny anyway
He's got one face he keeps for his woman
And one for when he's out with the guys
Sally wants a true man
Sally wants a true man
Sally wants a true man
But he's living out a lie

Better go and find an analyst, or something.
Time for sorting out his head.
Better go and find the book to read about it
Just like his daddy never did.

And he reads Marie Claire at the Doctors,
Just in case there is something he should know.
Sally wants a free man
Sally wants a free man
Sally wants a free man
But she will not let him go.

Billy is confused,
He feels abusive and abused.
He's got his one hand on an olive branch,
The other on his crotch.
He drives a sensible coupé,
He thinks Oasis are OK.
He drinks non-alcoholic lager though
He'd rather have a scotch.

And he tries very hard to be happy,
But there's a few little things in the way.

'Cause Billy wants a good girl
And a bad girl
And a blonde girl
And a brunette
Or a Bond Girl
And a house maid
And a tease maid
And a French maid,
Yeah, a sex aid,
And a Goddess
And a confidante,
A wet nurse and an agony aunt,
A lover, mother, baby sitter,
A young girl with a pretty face
And smart
But not too smart to love an asshole,
Yes, an asshole.
Billy wants to be an asshole.

Singin'
Billy wants it all now
Billy wants it all now
Billy wants it all now
But he's too ashamed to say.

Sally wants a Superman
Sally wants a Superman
Sally wants a Superman
She hasn't got a chance.