Padriac My Prince Testo

i had a brother once he drowned in a bathtub before he had ever learned how to talk and i dont know what his name was but my mother does i heard her say it once, padriac my prince i have all but died from the sheer weight of my shame. you cried but no one came and the water filled your tiny lungs. appear, my dear, and sing to me. it was six years ago today that we laid you in your grave, your sweet young skin was shining then too. and so tonight to celebrate i will poison myself. another coughing, shaking fit in a bathroom that is spinning. so i close the door and rest my head on the tile floor, sickness and sleep turning me cold. i am still not sure, is there some better place i should be heading towards? where the selfishly sick and self absorbed are welcome. i saw the future once. i was drunk in a phone booth. my eyes were wet and red but i could not tell what was said and through the screams of the traffic voiced carried saying i am sorry on a day so gray its black inside watching churches on tv in a coma you dont dream you just hope that someone sits with you babies turn blue when they are ignored like the sky on summer days before you turn and walk away it has changed you so tonight to compensate i will poison myself another coughing, shaking fit in a bathroom that is spinning.